The Advent Calendar

 

It was just over three months ago that Laurie underwent her operation. I think of Fridays as a reference point since that is the day of the week that her journey, at least physically, began. Last Friday was a time when I really reflected on what Laurie has had to deal with over the past three months. However, I spend more time now thinking of her future and when she will turn that corner on the road to recovery and become healthy once again.

 

She is very tired these days. She could give Rip Van Rinkle, Dwarf Sleepy and Princess Aurora a good stiff run for the "Who can sleep the longest" competition. Her energy level is minimal but sufficient to get her about the house independently and make a 300 meter walk down the road and back. Her spirit is still rather good. She would like to see her energy level higher and is following doctors' orders (all three of them) in obtaining her strength. Mentally, her memory is getting better. There are still some moments where a word is not placed correctly or she has problems in describing something. These episodes are typically brief and again may be due to her low energy level. I continue to take her temperature twice a day and occasionally her blood pressure. Only once since the last update has she had a bit of a fever and nothing that a Tylenol did not take care of.

 

Her final radiation session took place on October 17th as scheduled. There were many patients in the waiting rooms when the bell sounded about 13:00. Patients and staff acknowledged Laurie's accomplishment with clapping and smiles. We thanked those on her radiation team for their professionalism and compassion over the six weeks she was in their care. That evening was the last of her first round of chemotherapy. Since then, Laurie has been taking her other pills to help reduce any possible swelling that may still be in the brain as well as an anti-seizure pill. Taking these contributes to her being tired. Although the radiation sessions have stopped, the effects of this can continue for many weeks, months in fact. She will be seeing the chemotherapy oncologist in a couple of weeks. We should know when her MRI will be taken as it is not done immediately after the radiation sessions have stopped. By waiting longer, the MRI scans should produce a more accurate image of her brain where radiation was concentrated. She did bring home her radiation alignment mask and I can not honestly say where she has put it. It is something that I really do not wish to see anymore. She has lost much of her hair but continues not to openly fret very much about it. I am gauging the amount of hair loss by what is appearing in the dryer screen and in the shower. 

 

By no long having to drive into Ottawa for her appointments I felt that we would have another three to four hours of quiet time here at the house. In fact, I am not sure how we actually found the time to make those thirty five plus trips and still have time to eat and keep the place here going. I am working more hours now at my job and for the most part this is from the house. We have had two home care visits of about five and one-half hours which permitted me to go into the office and meet my colleagues and pick up some things.  Laurie's health and needs continue to be the number one priority and I am thankful that people at work fully understand this. However, I realize that I need to continue my work even if I do so late into the evening.

 

Time is also being spent on the transitional tasks that the autumn to winter change requires. There are more than I thought but this is likely because they are being condensed into a shorter real time period. Laurie usually has helped with these things but she is not able to do so this year. This frustrates her a little bit but knows that everything will get done. We did decide to empty our other storage locker before the snow and muck that November is notorious for arrives. This job has now been completed but the basement is looking rather like a warehouse with towers of boxes, chairs, furniture and bits and bobs. Is it too late to have a mammoth garage sale?

 

On October 27th we went into Ottawa for Laurie's postponed dental appointment. The dentist's office is very close to the Civic Hospital so the drive there was full of memories over the past few months. The dental staff knew that something had happened to Laurie as it was me who had called to cancel the original appointment in July. We spoke with her dentist who was very careful about Laurie's session and knew that planned X-rays should be postponed. On leaving the receptionist gave Laurie a big hug and wished her and I well. She booked Laurie's next appointment for February 14th and wished us both a very happy Christmas. They will indeed both be very special occasions for us even though Laurie may be a little sleepy.

The Silence of Tears

And then there were two. The final two radiation appointments are around the proverbial corner. It has been a long road for Laurie, literally and figuratively. Since the start of her journey on July 22nd, there have been about 36 return trips into Ottawa to reach this point. It would have been a shorter drive to Vancouver for us assuming that serious road detours were not playing against us. Much of the traveling has been relatively peaceful and quiet. We talk; but not a lot. We think about things though. I sometimes ask Laurie what she is thinking about. Her answers are often short.  I don't press her for more information or insight.  She does seem to have interest in pointing out the idiocies taking place in traffic which are numerous and sometimes interesting. Like the time that we were driving north into Ottawa and a car coming onto the south bound 416 (a four lane highway) had stopped and did a U-turn on the highway attempting to go back up the on-ramp. OK - that was interesting. We were glad that we were going in the opposite direction.

 

The twenty-eight radiation sessions have been challenging in several ways. The side-effects become more difficult to deal with as the sessions continue. Her level of energy is quite low and she continues to lose more hair. She has mentioned about getting a wig. She is hopeful that sometime next week her hair will stop falling out and once again begin to grow. The wig comment is taken as light conversation but she is concerned about it.  We have seen her chemotherapy oncologist this past week. He is pleased with her progress and the drugs that she currently takes will end with the last radiation treatment - scheduled for Monday, October 17th. Her chemotherapy drugs cost about $225.00 per day although thanks to employee benefits and some behind the scenes financial contributions we pay only a few cents. Towards the end of November, Laurie will resume her chemotherapy but on a five days per month basis. The dosage may be as much as 2.5 times what she currently takes. The difference is that she takes these pills every day now which makes her uniformly tired. She would likely take the high-dose pills for up to six months; however she will likely be very tired the week the pills are taken.

 

We see her radiation oncologist after her last session. We will find out what the next steps will be. We know, for example, that there will be an MRI taken. I would assume that the future strategy for Laurie's recovery is based on the cancer team's review of blood work and analyses of the various images taken since the first ones were taken in July. For Laurie, she is simply looking forward to not having to make the daily commute into the hospital.  Her surgeon is interested in having a peek at the MRI and a follow-up appointment after that. It is good to know that there are multiple minds involved in Laurie's recovery. It would be good to have a consensus in what her future treatment plan will be with the view of getting her health restored. We continue to ask many questions along the way.

 

And then there were too - too many sleepless nights when only the worst scenarios filled my head. Outwardly, I displayed optimism but alone, at night, my thoughts went from white to black, light to dark and I wondered about the how and why Laurie was struck with brain cancer. I told myself that I would trade places with her, to try and have the courage that she had in her. However, for someone who gets weak-kneed at the sight of a needle, any needle, any where, having enough courage would be a real challenge.

 

For now, Laurie is getting better. Her memory is recovering quite well although short lapses are sometimes apparent. She, and I, are gaining back weight we lost since July. Physically, she is somewhat weakened by the radiation and chemotherapy but this was expected. Her humour has not left her as much as her hair has. She is taking her time in her recovery which is precisely what she has been told to do. She is a good listener. She is a good person and she will be a cancer survivor.

 

Thanks to everyone who have dropped in to the house, sent or brought cards, flowers, food and best wishes to Laurie and myself. We completed that 1,000 piece puzzle recently (actually 1,008 pieces) and had a good time doing it. Laurie's friends seem to span three generations of colleagues, friends and acquaintances. This is something that I have thought about on more than one occasion. The different life experiences of these people - you- have contributed to Laurie's well being and hope for the future. Many of you have wished her courage along her road to recovery which has aided her in ways that I can not say but do feel.

 

Stop for a moment on Monday, October 17th at 13:00 and list for the bell - the sound of happiness, of joy and inevitably, the silence of tears.

 

Thankfully Red in the Face

Growing old is not for sissies. Neither is having brain cancer. Or any cancer. Or radiation treatment. Having the combination of being old and having one of these illnesses is certainly not on anyone's wish list. It's a tough go. I see people every day of all descents, shapes, sizes, ages and illnesses. Maybe I am getting used to visiting the cancer clinic daily. But probably not. Each day is different. New faces appear and others have left upon the ringing of the bell. More of the staff now have names to go with familiar faces. The idiosyncrasies of parking, knowing when best to visit the pharmacy and who to seek out for information are becoming second nature. I bought a box of Tim-bits one day and left it at the administration counter in the radiation area. A little gesture of thanks but it seemed to make a difference in the day-to-day routines that both the staff and the patients experience.

Since the last posted update on September 19th, Laurie has taken nine more radiation sessions. The side effects are now showing. The most prominent are the fatigue and the hair loss.  Much of her hair that grew back following the operation has fallen out. More hair is appearing around the house and car every day. I think that she is a little distressed about it but she knows that it should all come back after the radiation sessions are over. There is also occasional swelling and redness on the left side of her face and head. I believe that she is managing these conditions better than one might expect or hope for.  A moist face cloth applied to her face for ten minutes several times a day makes her feel refreshed and reduces the redness. She is knowledgeable about the side effects and not openly complaining. I ask how she is doing and she responds positively. However, the radiation and chemotherapy have caused her to slow down somewhat. She is now two-thirds through the radiation sessions. Her small advent type calendar on the refrigerator is something that she attends to as soon as we return from the hospital during the week days. Her half-way point session has a decorated number "16" on it.  With each session and new count down number posted, we hug and hope that each session is doing her good. Her final session is currently to take place on Monday, October 17th - something to be belatedly thankful for. 

We meet once a week with her radiation oncologist to go over how she is doing. Our last visit lasted 3 minutes and 20 seconds which is longer than all the previous visits combined. So far, the course of treatments has remained the same although she may be taking a reduce dosage of one of her drugs later this week. She has not needed to consult the radiation nurse lately which is good as many others are lining up to do so. Her speech therapist has come for the last time unless Laurie feels that she would like some assistance in dealing with speech issues.

Around the house Laurie is managing to participate in new activities. This is a gradual process and one that can help her along the road to recovery. She is now writing along with me the things that happened on each day.  Her memory is steadily improving and her writing is quite good. Friends visiting the house brought along a puzzle which, according to the literature on patients having had brain tumour surgery, is something that helps in the thinking and healing process. We work on the puzzle each day until she feels that she would like to do something else. We continue to walk outside and to make a point of climbing the stairs to the basement more for exercise than necessity. Of course, we look forward to watching something good on the television. Recently, we are watching the Lovejoy series (the adventures of an East Anglian antiques dealer from 1986-1994) and also Inspector Lewis, both on DVDs that we bought. Our Sunday evening is in part spent watching Inspector Morse. Her colleagues from the Canadian Museum of Nature sent a very nice card with thoughtful messages. They also kindly chipped in to get her a gift card that she can use to buy books, music or DVDs. She is only now beginning to turn on the computer and one of the first things she did was to visit the store web-site where she can use her gift card. I am sure that she will choose carefully and enjoy whatever she decides upon.

The September weather was kind to us. Laurie read through the daily journal of our trip to Scotland last September, where it seems, every day had its share of rain. Good weather helps to heal in more ways than one. It allows us to be outside more and the sun is good for her outlook. She likes the higher air pressure associated with the brighter days. We are noticing just how quickly it becomes dark now. We have both commented that it must be very difficult for people to travel for their sessions during the winter months, especially if they live outside of the city as we do.  The concern for others is something that we both think about. Although Laurie made it through the darkest of days, others are now just beginning their journey and the outcomes are never predictable. There always seems to be a more difficult case just around the corner.

This week's schedule is much like the last two. Five sessions typically in mid afternoon means that we miss the worst of rush-hour and the diabolical street configurations that seem to choke traffic daily. We meet a different radiation oncologist this week since her regular one is away - hopefully enjoying a nice holiday someplace. No other appointments are on the calendar except perhaps for a visit to the greenhouse. The home-care visits are now reduced to the point where we call if we would like some home care for Laurie. Only a day's notice is really required for this to happen. There is no session on Thanksgiving day but she resumes her treatments the day after. We see her chemotherapy oncologist after Thanksgiving for his assessment of her progress. She seems very pleased that the sessions are coming to a close and her chemotherapy will change from daily to five consecutive days per month.

On a recent Monday visit, the radiation technician came to get Laurie from the waiting room ahead of schedule. He was quite red all over his face and his arms. It appeared that something went awry in the radiation room, that his microwave threw a fit, or that he got toasted by the sun over the  weekend. Well, he assured us that it was the latter event that caused his condition and a little bit of embarrassment. I gathered the other radiation technicians got a good laugh on Monday morning. This reminded me of the time when I worked for the Canadian Coast Guard back in the early 1980s. I took my kayak out on Georgian Bay one sunny Sunday afternoon when a good blow came through raising the waves and my dad's fears of a mishap. My dad, being concerned and also employed by the CCG, made a call to someone at the base about my situation. It was decided that a search and rescue crew would go out looking for me. Little did they know but I escaped the storm by landing on an island where I was invited to have tea, little sandwiches and a variety of biscuits by a British couple who were vacationing there. Needless to say that I was a little red in the face and embarrassed on arriving to the base for work on Monday morning. At least it made people smile and laugh and gave the lads on search and rescue a little extra on their pay cheques.

Ringing the Bell

Monday, September 19, 2011

 

It has been a full week now since the last update on Laurie's health. I am pleased to report that she is maintaining course for her recovery plans. She is now participating in more activities around the house and we venture a little further each day along the road on her morning walks. Her sleeping is going well and her sickness has not returned since her first two days of radiation. A good balance of resting, eating, drinking and exercise continues. She did take time to down load the photos from the BlackBerry to the home computer. I took many pictures of her along her journey that she had never seen before. In fact, she really did not know that I had taken them. Some of the photos are very poignant and I was not sure how she would react. Not to my surprise, she simply went through them and asked the occasional question or two. I was more struck by some of the photos than she was and I was the photographer!

 

The appointments last week were at the end of the afternoon which meant commuting to the hospital was typically slow in both directions. Once at the hospital, the sessions went well. Laurie must be close to being a model patient for the radiation staff. Always pleasant and undemanding and a good listener. She is taking everything in perspective. There are other patients in the waiting room who appear to be suffering more, at least outwardly.  It seems to me that many of patients are there alone and not with any family or friends. This must be difficult for some of them.

 

The bell to signify the last of someone's chemotherapy sessions rang twice last week while we were present. In the first instance, a little boy of perhaps six years of age, head completely devoid of hair and quite red, had finished his treatments. He was a little small for reaching the rope on the bell but his father pulled the cord and the three or four staff there with them all clapped and smiled as we did. He seemed to be in good spirits and I wondered just how rough a start in his life that he has experienced and what his future may be like.   The second ringing was from a woman whom I would estimate to be in her fifties or early sixties. It is difficult to give an age since the treatments may dramatically affect the person's appearance. She rang the bell with vigour and cried and smiled while doing so. The sound of clapping accompanied her joy and I am sure that there is emotional sentiment from those thinking of her and the completion of their own treatments.

 

Last week also saw us visit her neurological surgeon at the Civic Hospital. This is a rudimentary follow-up that we were anxiously waiting for. He is a very genuine doctor who took his time with Laurie. He is very interested in seeing the results of his labour, starting with the healing of the incision on her head. All is well there and he seemed pleased. He conducted a number of physical tests with Laurie and asked her about how she was feeling. Overall, a nice meeting to have had. The next meeting with him will be after Laurie has completed her radiation sessions at which time another MRI will be taken. He will review the baseline images taken just prior to the sessions starting and the images after her six weeks of treatments. It is good to know that there are several doctors who are following Laurie's progress and doing their own assessments.

 

Like many of you we find that weekends are something that you look forward too. Not only do we not have the drive into Ottawa but there seems to be a fall fair or event taking place every weekend. These activities offer variety to our weekly routine and with the nice weather here in Eastern Ontario we have some choice. Last weekend we went to a nearby apple orchard and bought some nice fresh fruit. We did not pick ourselves this year but many of those there were doing just that. We did some walking by the Rideau waterway and St. Lawrence River where Laurie was identifying plants and birds. We met a mink at one point that seemed as curious about us as we were of it. It seems to me that there are many events taking place in the small towns and villages that the city folk travel too with anticipation. I am not sure how many of us country bumpkins are heading into the city on the weekend. I believe that there is a special appeal to being in rural Ontario in September, especially with sunny skies and comfortable temperatures.

 

Treatment number 12 was today along with a consultation with her radiation oncologist.  Monday is his open clinic from 13:30 to 15:30 when patients can see him. I am not sure where the onus lies on prearranging the topics of discussion. The wait was quite long, well over one hour in fact. He came into the consultation room with his usual vigour and confidence. He seems to have an overabundance of patients which means that his time is carefully rationed. As Laurie appears to be doing quite well, he does not spend more than a few minutes with us. We think that he must be devoting his time to those patients where things are not working out as well. This is quite understandable and we hope that all of his future Monday sessions with us will be short ones.

 

Waiting in the hospital is something that you must adapt to. It is amazing to me how many National Geographic magazines from the mid 1980s to the late 1990s are there in excellent condition. We are typically careful about what we handle in the hospital and take precautions that others may feel are unnecessary. However, with Laurie's decreased immune system she must be vigilant in minimizing her risk to catching something.  Some people seem to wait with impatience and others simply fall asleep. I tend not to be able to read as Laurie usually does. My mind wanders. I look at the other patients and the doctors and hospital staff and think about different things. I know that there are people there who are just beginning their journey and the apprehension is there to show this. For others, it appears that they have just finished work at the office and they stopped in to get their usual treatment before stopping at Swiss Chalet for a take-out. Still, for them, there is a story that lies in their recent past. I seem to be the only person who is taking notes, at least those of the written kind. My small binder is quite full now and yet I am adding paper weekly. Not just my daily updates but notes relating to upcoming appointments, prescription renewals and the names of new support staff that Laurie can call upon if needed.

 

As mentioned, we had a long wait between Laurie's 12th radiation session and the meeting with her radiation oncologist. My mind wandered again back to grade school and to poor Harry. You see, after Harry's regrettable performance relating to his essay on summer fun, he landed himself in more difficulty with Mr. Connors. This time, Harry had to write a 500 word essay on "The air inside a ping-pong ball". It amazes me that I can still remember this sort of thing and I wonder if Harry does to. The essay itself was not presented to the class as his first one was. So, I can not report now what Harry was able to write on such a topic. This is what I was wondering about during our lengthy wait having gone over my mental assessments of the waiting room persons and activities. It is strange that the subject would even be imagined. What could someone, especially in grade seven, write on this? I put my mind on to the subject and it is not an easy one to deal with. I could not even reasonably put my first words together. I know that I would have received an F- from Mr. Connors for my lack of original thinking.

 

This week's appointments are quite diverse for timing. We have two days where we will be part of the rush hour crowd. Three of the appointments are at new times and it will be interesting to see the hospital at those times and what may be different than during our usual hours. I am sure that some new faces will be there in the radiation waiting rooms. Perhaps new radiation technicians will be there as well. There are always two of these people taking care of Laurie and they always seem to be congenial and quite young. The latter feeling is probably simply due to my age. I know most of them by first name basis even if they are in the hallway somewhere outside of the radiation area.  Laurie will be taking her fifteenth session this Thursday (September 22nd). This date will be a half-way milestone and one that I am sure she will be most proud of. She does not show much emotion throughout her sessions as she has accepted that these are integral to her recovery. The only time that she has really shed a tear or two is when she is playing a song on her guitar. I think that doing both of these things are good for her.

 

I need to think of something special to do to mark her milestone achievement. This is a more practical subject to consider compared to meeting Harry's challenge and I can put my mind to it over the next few days.  I know that there will be no deductions for brevity, poor grammar or spelling. Whatever this something special is I hope that she will be as pleased with it as I am in her achievement. 

 

 

Passages of Time, this year and last

"Time" is a word that most of us cherish. It is used in a variety of ways but perhaps none more meaningful in context when one considers recovery time. Many usages of the word "time" refer to the moment or of an instance. I think that we are essentially expressing time in this sort of dimension now. It was seven weeks ago today that Laurie had her operation. Think about what you have done over those seven weeks. For us, the variation on what we do is quite minimal. This is frustrating but we realize that progress is taking place in the proper direction; however slow it may be.  Being at home with Laurie, I thought that I would have time to do all sorts of things - including the issuance of more timely updates. However, the day is quite fractionalized and I seem to have lots of little bits of time to do specific things. Finding more substantial periods of time to engage in non essential tasks, like writing for instance, are difficult to find. For someone who likes to keep the cars clean both inside and out, I have failed to vacuum or wash them since the end of June. There is just no time for this sort of activity.

 

A decade ago, this date was a moment in time that most people around the world will recall. Canadians in eastern Canada were particularly affected and likely recall the events of September 11th, 2001 with more feeling and emotion than others may do. I can recall exactly what I was doing on that fateful morning when the seemingly unbelievable news traveled through the office. It was certainly a time of apprehension and anxiety for us living north of the 49th parallel and a nightmarish time for those living in New York, New York Washington D.C. and around Shanksville Pennsylvania. Time is supposed to heal all wounds but something tells me that the survivors and the families of the victims of 9/11 will forever be dealing with the tragedies that took place.

 

For Laurie and I, we are primarily thinking of the week ahead. We try and remember the successes of the previous week while writing our upcoming activities. In order to help us manage time and tasks we have a small white board and different coloured markers. Laurie is the scribe for this. I have kept and continue to keep notes for each day since July 22nd. I am now at page 99. Typically, Laurie is a note-taker. I was reminded of this when we were in the midst of packing for our move in August. Field books for every work related trip taken and for every endeavour related to bird outings and breeding atlases, bio-blitzes, recreational walks and cycling excursions, amphibian counts and the recording of the bird specifies and critters that visit our bird feeder each year. We both take a clean diary with us on our holidays and this is the only time that I really take notes. This is something that I have always seemingly done on holidays as far back as I can recall. What is quite surprising is that I actually have all of the summaries in one place. Although we write our diaries independently, there is a fair amount of overlap, except when it comes to botanical observations of course. You may find that there is a treatise on the local craft beer in my diary but then see several thoughts on whether a plant that Laurie found that day is introduced or native in her book. They are fun to reread but seldom did there seem to be any time to do this before.

 

Each morning now, Laurie is reading our trip diaries from our trip to Scotland in 2010. Not the whole diary mind you but just the notes that correspond to the current month and day but one year ago. So, this morning after a tasty breakfast she read aloud the bits of history, road travel, food and drink, natural history and the degree of manner of our B and B hostess for September 11, 2010. It does not take a long time to read through the notes unless the penmanship is a little off or the notes become decreasing more illegible as they extend to the bottom of a page and a fresh one is desired for the following day.  I have taken my diary notes for this day (Sept. 11, 2010) and entered them at the bottom of the more current events relating to Laurie's progress and well-being. You can certainly tell how much a life can change in the course of a year looking at the notes from then and now. We both feel that one day we will be looking around to buy new diaries for a trip to a destination that neither of us has even really contemplated at this time.

 

The last status covered up to September 4th.  Generally, and above all, Laurie is dealing with her radiation and chemotherapy sessions very well. Over the past week, the scheduling was such that we needed to be at the radiation clinic for 16:40 or 17:00 each day except for the holiday Monday. This scheduling allows Laurie to spend most of the day doing what she pleases, including sleeping in a little.  The actual radiation activity only takes three minutes; however the round-trip is taking about three hours. This is still time well spent no matter what possible view you take on the situation.  So far she is experiencing very little of the radiation and the chemotherapy side effects (I have just knocked on the desk here). The initial sessions were very difficult but since Monday, September 4th, she has not been physical ill. We still minimize the risk of her becoming so and are vigilant in terms of dealing with the possibility should she become so.  She has not suffered redness or acute swelling. Her hair is seemingly growing with speed as opposed to the opposite. Her level of energy is OK all things considered and her spirit and attitude are positive.

 

Laurie's memory is improving but there is still ground to cover. For instance, the game of twenty questions presents quite a few challenges. This game involves different levels of cognitive thinking and memory and is one of the more difficult exercises that we are now doing. Her vocabulary is coming along in three languages - English, French and Latin. Her speech therapist is not coming the week of September 12th but will come over the following week. She is reading a lot. We unboxed some more cartons and pulled out some reading material for her. She seems to like reading but has some problems in recalling the names of the books that she recently read. I sometimes wonder if she is absorbing the stories or simply reading the words. We did play some cribbage and she did very well in assessing her cards, making a strategy and taking her points. I was very impressed with this task which we do not treat as such.

 

On tap for this week are the five scheduled radiation appointments (numbers seven through eleven). Monday the 12th we see a cancer out patient social worker. After this we will visit her radiation oncologist. This latter meeting is something that we will do every Monday before her radiation session. Later in the week we meet her neuro surgeon at another hospital. This meeting was to be held last week but even surgeons need summer holidays. We are not sure what will be discussed but he did require that CT scan that Laurie had about ten days ago. We feel that it will be an assessment of her progress as he sees it. Laurie is still very unclear about what had happened and can not really remember events that took place with her initial trip to the hospital and her release some two weeks later. In the overall scheme of things this is not very important seeing as I have many pages of notes. She has not read the blog since she does not yet realize that there is one. I am hoping that some day she will read what you have been reading and what she has been living through.  She appears optimistic and more understanding of what is taking place this week. She is now able to sort out her various pills and dosages for both morning and evening. She is quite interested in reading the fact sheets about her prescriptions and asks me time and time again to go over each prescription's purpose and dosage. Her balance is quite strong and she continues to stretch and wishes to take short walks. She does still carry her stick which is something that I have seen her rely on at times. Finally, she wishes to return to the greenhouse and see how her grasses are doing.

 

We did two walks over the past weekend. The first was along the St. Lawrence River at Prescott, Ontario. We took our time and enjoyed the weather and quiet activities surrounding us. It is not often that you do not see a large ship plying the waters but Saturday was one such day. On Sunday we returned to the river but farther east - to the Morrisburg area. We strolled along the path next to the river which had significantly more human and bird activity taking place. Again no lake freighters were seen. There is something calming about being next to the river and we just took our time to take in the sun and the smells. Laurie took her binoculars and was able to identify birds, butterflies and some plants. All this is very good to see and I need to keep reminding myself that it was only seven weeks ago that she was being operated on. 

 

As anticipated, the summary of Laurie's road to recovery is becoming shorter in length as the routine of the days becomes quite apparent. I would like to thank Marian in Nova Scotia for continuing to post Laurie's progress and for dealing with the photos that I have found and sent along. Each time that I see a photo that has been stored in a computer file that I have not seen for years brings back the memories of the wonderful journeys that we have taken together.

 

Time to go. Below is the diary entry from my journal. How much life can suddenly take a turn is certainly evident from what we did then.

 

September 11, 2010 (Glencoe, Scotland).

 

Up at 07:15 and into the shower. It was also a shower outside - in fact pouring! Wondered if the hike to the Lost Valley would leave at 10:00? Had a nice breakfast. There was a couple from Italy and an older woman arriving after 08:00. A nice meal but not the full monty. It continued to rain as we left the B & B heading to the Glencoe Visitor's Centre. Arrived about 09:40 and checked in for the trip. There were five women also doing the walk - four from Germany I believe and one older lady from somewhere in the UK. The two guides were Johnny and Matt. Started off by completely encasing ourselves in anything waterproof. The trip was to go for about four hours. Lots of rain and slippery walking to be sure.

 

There were a few interpretation stops including one that spoke of a hidden person counter. It worked on the pressure of someone walking over a sensor a little bit buried. Took pictures of the area and of the group - constantly in rain. People seemed pleased just to be out and getting exercise (walking, climbing, swimming). Tough going in places - certainly more challenging than say Ben Nevis was back in 1996. Once having entered the Lost Valley we saw a herd of deer, maybe 35 to 40 in all. Had the sandwiches we bought in the village earlier. Passed around the cookies we brought but only the two guides took advantage.

 

The rain had ceased by now but was still ever present. The walk back took a different route most of the way. With all of the rain, the creeks were turned into rivers. We needed to ford one and this is where I got wet. The stepping stones were basically under water and deep enough that it topped my boots, ergo, two very wet feet. Laurie faired a little better than I did but some others got just as wet. Am wondering if these boots will ever dry in the future, at least at the B & B.

 

Having successfully managed the Hidden Valley (Lost Valley in the Three Sisters) walk, we got back into the Park Services Land Rover for the drive back to the Visitor's Centre. Said our good-byes and got the hiking ideas from Matt. Back at the B & B and Maureen's offer of a pot of tea was immediately taken up. She also carried away my boots to some secret drying chamber. Having then converted our room into a drying room and examining everything that got wet, including passports, we had a wee lie of perhaps 70 to 80 minutes. It was raining lightly whenever I opened an eye. Egads!  Will it ever stop raining? About 16:30 we headed out to see a sale of free-trade Tibetan things where Laurie bought a nice hat. The girl working the traveling exhibit and sale was from the Czech Republic. Carried on up the road to the village hiking trails where there are three of them all joined up. We walked the Woodland Trail which was 1.5 miles long and very well maintained and sign-posted. Some huge trees, lots of moss and ferns, etc - just what one would expect being in Glencoe. Began to rain again and the umbrella was used to minimize the shoes getting wet. Near the end and the car park we bumped into Ben (the B & B dog) and Ken along with another dog and Ken's friend. After a short chap about the weather and walking, we headed to the B & B via the village store where I bought single cans of beer. Returning wet for the second time in one day we hung up what we could and decided that going to the Clachaig Hotel for dinner was in order.

 

It is about two miles from the village so we drove the single lane road encountering a few cars and people. The Clachaig was quite busy and I lucked into parking in the last real space - almost hitting a car whose driver was attempting to weasel by me. Inside, there were about ten real ales - mostly from Houston Brewing. I settled on a beer from Williams that was excellent. Laurie had a salmon with spuds and veggies and I had a chicken done Cajun style with chips and veggies. Very good place and very busy - even at 20:45 when we headed over to the bar area.

 

The bar was packed with excitement - at least lots of loud talking and laughing. Got a real ale (Warlock Stout) and found a spot before the substitute three person band came on. Actually pretty good all things considered. Several dogs in various states of anxiety were about including some very docile small grey hounds (welties?). We enjoyed the music and atmosphere until 22:00 the departed for the B & B. Maureen welcomed us back and locked up as we must have been the last of the guests to call it a night.

Good things come to those who Ask

Plan B. What a ubiquitous thing that this has become to many of us. It can mean anything from selecting an alternate route to work should the traffic look like you are driving in Manila to what type of Ben and Jerry's ice cream to buy given that your favourite was also many other shoppers' fav. too.

 

Our lives here have many of these Plan Bs. In some cases, we know enough now to have a firm one in mind and even, dare say, a Plan C just in case. These plans have come in quite handy. I will relate some of these in the update below.

 

Given that there is a high level of uniformity now in Laurie's situation, I will dispense with the daily updates. A summary of the events having taken place since the last report will be given - both the highs and the lows of things. There will undoubtedly be some natural chronology required so that the events make more sense in their relationships.

 

Some of the readers had experienced the recent effects of hurricane Irene. Those more eastward of here were sure to have encountered some consequence. We had some very minor edge-of-the-storm action and nothing severe occurred.  I was thinking though that storms like hurricanes, and more particularly, tornados can be an allegory for Laurie's recent experiences. Having come home from the hospital on August 5th after her initial battle with her brain tumour, she has been, generally, getting quite better in all aspects - mentally, physically and physiologically. However, as she entered into the second set of challenges - the radiation and the chemotherapy, she has regressed at times. It was like the tornado hit her hard in July and we entered into the eye and things were looking pretty good. Then the tail end of the storm came upon us and things became quite difficult for her.

 

Sometimes no matter how much one plans, the storm is just so overwhelming that you find yourselves helpless and it does not matter how many plans that you may have though of. Fortunately, we have not reached this point although at times it seemed that we were darn close to that.

 

The last update was sent on Friday, August 26.   Since then we have encountered three delays in Laurie's start date for her radiation therapy. The original plan, Plan A, was that Laurie was to have her first radiation session on August 30th. As the day arrived and we were preparing for this major event, the radiation oncologist's nurse called to say that the treatment would be cancelled for that day. The rescheduled appointment was for August 31st. The first postponement was reasonably explained. On Monday, August 28th, she had a CT scan and also an MRI. Upon review of the images, the oncologist decided to change the instrument that Laurie would be treated with. So, this meant that they had to find a spot in the queue for her on this other instrument. Makes perfect sense and there would be benefits for her on this other instrument.

 

So, August 31st was to be the new launch date. Then, we got the word; "Houston, we have a problem". I could sort of sense this when the telephone rang and we were actually on the road to the 17:00 appointment. Apparently, the equipment broke down or in more technical terminology, there was a systems malfunction. Good thing that she was not being radiated on when the system malfunctioned I thought. So, we made a smooth exit off of the highway into the town of Kemptville which is where we rely on the pharmacists and grocers. Being somewhat disappointed, we took a Plan B for our new found time and went to see about some medication that was awaiting us at the drug store.

 

The prescription in question was related to Laurie's regular medication that she took before her illness struck. I saw that she had only about two weeks left of her pills and decided to reorder early. Apparently, this was a wise thing to do. The issue was that the pills were on back order for about six months. This originally caused us some consternation but the pharmacist reassured us that she would contact Laurie's GP about a suitable replacement. After several days of waiting, I called the drug store to see where we stood. There was still no decision made because the GP had not gotten back to the pharmacist. So, I told the pharmacist that I would call the doctor and get things moving. After leaving two messages at her office I felt that getting somewhere will this medication replacement may not be so simple. It looked like an Abbott and Costello routine at this point.

 

After over one week of inactivity, in my eyes at least, the pharmacist called and said the replacement drug was ready. This brings me back to the swift exit off of the highway on August 31st. I will not pick up a new medication and leave the store without speaking with the pharmacist as I did on this occasion. The replacement drug were little white pills that were all ready to go. We learned in a question and answer session that the active ingredient was suspended in some type of peanut based agent. Well, seeing that Laurie is highly allergic to peanuts then a problem was at hand. Plan B had failed and could have been much worse. If we did not learn of the peanut presence and Laurie had taken a pill then she would have been in anaphylactic shock and a call to 911 would have been made.

 

So, making our concerns of what we felt to be inadequate record keeping to the pharmacist, we left with nothing. Noting that there she had only about four or five days worth of her original pills, I went to Plan C. This was because the pharmacist told us that there was nothing else that she could provide. So, I called a drug store in Ogdensburg, New York and enquired as to the availability of her original pills. Well, they had plenty of them. Now Ogdensburg is only about a 30 minute drive from here if you obey the speed limits. The only stipulation to me getting the pills was that I needed a note from Laurie's GP explaining the shortage of the pills in Ontario (along with the prescription of course). So, this was my Plan C. However, the doctor's letter was integral to the plan and I was not able to contact her and messages left were not returned.

 

I explained to Laurie's case manager the situation we were in and my Plan C. She was agreeable to hunting down the doctor and getting this letter. In fact, the case manager would drive it down to the house. Brilliant. Then, the pharmacist called. She had talked with the GP and a substitute medication was identified and in fact waiting for us at the pharmacy. Good grief. With only two days' worth of pills left, the timing was rather tight. So, back up to the drug store and the new drugs were picked up after an interrogation like talk with the pharmacist.

 

The rescheduled radiation and chemotherapy start date was September 1, 2011 (just to clarify the actual year) at 17:20. So, getting prepared in all the various ways, we headed up to the hospital expecting the telephone to ring - likely just as I entered through the parking gate. No such call came and on we went. Before the first radiation session takes place, an appointment with a nurse is scheduled. Presumably, this is to go over all of the ins and outs of the treatment which would include some discussion on specific topics - usually the side effects. Our nurse turned out to be a five star person. She not only gave us a nice summary of the basics, she organized future appointments with a dietician, a physical therapist, and a cancer social worker. But that is not all. She arranged for an immediate blood test that Laurie's GP wanted. Then she handled the issue of my calls to the surgeon's office for a refill on Laurie's drugs not been returned. She popped out for a few minutes then came back and said that Laurie's pills would be at the hospital pharmacy counter in twenty minutes. If I had a self adhesive gold star then I would have placed it on her forehead. Laurie and I were most impressed especially since the radiation technologist took Laurie away about twenty seconds after our meeting with the nurse wound up. 

 

Off to the first radiation treatment. We were quite pleased. As it was the first visit for radiation treatment, we were instructed on a number of important aspects. This included using your bar coded identification card to let the staff know that you had arrived. If you wanted to see a nurse or a doctor then the methods to do this are given. Your weekly schedule is given on each Thursday visit which lays out the next five or six appointments. If you have a conflict with an appointment time then the instructions for dealing with this were presented. The arrangement to see the oncologist on a weekly basis was also reviewed. Good thing that I had lots of ink in my pen and paper to spare. Finally, they tell you that you can have all the candies that you wish!

 

The radiation only took three minutes. The added time is due to the preparation part - the fitting of the mask and the testing bit to ensure that everything would go according to Plan A.  So, Laurie came back to waiting room just as the BBC sport highlights were about to begin. We left there pleased that it was one session down and now 29 more to go.  I would be responsible for the chemotherapy part as I had the $10,000 worth of drugs secretly tucked away at the house and had the instructions memorized.

 

Thursday, September 1st was a night to remember. At about 01:00 the side effects began. Poor Laurie. She was sick in the mixing bowl that was placed right beside the bed. This continued almost hourly for the rest of the night. Although she took an anti-nausea pill before the chemotherapy pills, the effects of having started radiation and chemotherapy on the same day proved to be most devastating on her system. So, the night was long and painful. She understood why this was happening to her. All I could do was give another anti-nausea pill every four hours and hope for the best. Morning came and it was as if neither of us really slept at all. She was experiencing what the literature and the hospital staff had indicated might happen after the treatments. To me, there is no "treat" in these treatments.

 

Friday saw her back at the General for her second session. The time was for 17:20 and judging by all of the optimal parking spots available, quite quiet at the hospital. It was Friday prior to the long weekend.  There is a hospital protocol that one sees a nurse after their first radiation treatment and before the second. As arranged, the nurse spoke with us to get a sense of how Laurie managed over the last 24 or so hours. Having related the experiences, the nurse indicated that this seemed somewhat normal but she would like to speak to a doctor concerning a change to one of Laurie's prescription dosages. This nurse also would have received a gold star. Running five minutes ahead of time the technician took Laurie to the radiation instrument. The hospital was eerily quiet. I caught up a little on my note taking and savoured a watermelon flavoured bon bon as Laurie walked back by herself to the waiting room. A little hug and smile and she and I wondered what to do next. You see, she also had a CT scan scheduled for 21:00 in the same hospital. Since the time was only about 17:35 we pondered what our plan would be.

 

As we were contemplating what seemed to be just a few boring options of what to do I caught wind of a conversation from the only other people around. It was a man and his kids and a radiation nurse. He had just completed his last session in an eight week period and the nurse was reviewing some of the possible actions in his future. This man knew that there was a bell in the adjacent hallway that a person who completes their radiation program can ring. I heard this once on an earlier visit and response to the ringing was clapping from those in the waiting room and the staff. However, this being the eerily quiet night it was he went along the vacant corridor and rang the bell. The sound of the bell echoed down the hallways without a response from anyone. We felt that we should have clapped from where we were but did not. This we both regret. I wanted to say congratulations to him as he walked by us but I thought that this would have demonstrated that we had big ears. We thought of him afterwards and all the things that he might have gone through in order to ring that bell. We wish him well in his journey.

 

Now, I had packed a small cooler bag with some soft nourishment and drinks for Laurie to have between the two appointments. I had left this in the car thinking that a walk would help to fill the two and a half hours of waiting time. Then I thought of Plan B. Why not go and find the Module X on the second floor and find out exactly where the 21:00 appointment will be.

 

Now, I believe that M.C. Escher was a member of the architectural committee that designed the General Hospital. I had in fact been sent a floor plan of how to find Module X.  This map is not to be handled as junk mail. With the map and after a couple of navigational failures, we did arrive in the correct location. A very pleasant person was sitting behind the glow of a computer monitor as we approached. We wanted to know if there was a chance that Laurie's 21:00 could be moved up. The waiting room only had one person and she was on a gurney sound asleep. I explained that Laurie had just had her radiation session and now she was available for the scan. It never hurts to ask so don't be shy about this. After an immediate and short telephone call, we were told to proceed down the hall and take the last door on the right to the CT scan waiting room. It seemed that either there had been about 20 CT scan cancellations or the appointment times are somewhat randomly distribution. What a stroke of luck though. I decided right then to stop on the way home a buy a 6/49 ticket (which being a statistician I did not actually do.) 

 

Expecting more than an empty CT scan waiting room I was found to be wrong. Just the technician was there and asked Laurie to go straight on in - no change into a hospital gown was even needed. A few minutes later Laurie was done. I had virtually no time to look at any of the articles in June 2009 issue of Field and Stream. As we walked along the corridor we talked about the value of having a Plan B. The woman who made the original call for us was on the telephone as we left but she raised a thumb and smiled at our success.

 

So we were on our way back home a couple of hours ahead and thinking about how good things come to those who ask. We also thought about the chap who had completed his treatments and celebrated in relative silence.

 

The illness experienced during the early morning on Friday, Sept. 2nd was reduced by about half during the wee hours of Saturday morning. The prompt administration of the anti-nausea pill after four hours seemed to help a little. Still, the compound effects of radiation and chemotherapy was very stressing to the body. The reason that both treatments began at the same time was explained by one of the gold star nurses. The chemotherapy apparently makes the radiation more effective and thus is prescribed at the same time and not before radiation starts. It was felt that given Laurie's tough first night that the side effects from the radiation were more severe than those caused by the chemotherapy.

 

Meal plans have changed a little now. The traditional three meals a day are still there but the volume of the servings are a little less. A couple of times during the day, some small snacks are taken. This is now likely to be the approach over the next six weeks. I am fine with this since I can now have five meals a day rather than three. Plenty of fluids, focusing mostly on just water, is also an essential part of the treatment period. Rest and light exercise have been, and will continue to be, important aspects of recovery.

 

The weekend was a little better in terms of her sleeping and the level of her treatment side effects. Saturday night was actually a good night with no sickness being experienced. In part, this may have been due to me giving Laurie an anti-nausea pill at midnight and at 04:00. The Plan A is to get up for a few minutes to give the drugs as early as possible according to the prescription and then hope for the best. The Plan B is to try and deal with the sickness as best we can with the guidance provided. Plan C would be to call the telephone number at the radiation area and speak with an oncologist. There is at least one such doctor available 24/7 to offer advice on difficult situations. One result could be that a nurse comes down to the house and administers an intravenous drug.

 

Some friends came over on Sunday morning (Sept. 4th) and we had a nice time. After a while Laurie did show some tiredness and we said goodbye and thanks to our friends who not only brought their friendship but lots of nice home made goodies as well.  The day ended with a episode of Inspector Morse. This will be our Sunday evening tradition as it is good to have such things. Watching these shows I can not help but think of John Thaw who passed away from cancer in 2002 and the ordeals that he faced. I read a book last year written by his wife, Sheila Hancock about their life together. I do not usually read biographies but I did quite enjoy this one. Worth the read if you enjoy British cinema. I will note that to get a copy of the book may require you having several different plans as it seems to be quite scarce.

 

Egg farms, carpet cleaning and appointments

 

Good morning / afternoon / evening -

Laurie's father Arthur was the head administrator in several small Ontario town hospitals. His last tour of duty was performed at the Stevenson Memorial Hospital in Alliston, a small town of maybe 10,000 people north west of Toronto. Not having obtained much experience with hospital settings in the past I could not fully appreciate what his responsibilities might have entailed. He always seemed to be a man who left his job at the office but that he was very good at it when there. He was very well respected by those who knew and worked with him. Not by chance, I daresay, Laurie worked in the kitchen at the hospital. I believe that she was responsible for such tasks as getting meal trays ready for delivery and for dealing with the returned ones (and all of the food that was probably tucked under the various containers and empty packaging). This put some spending money in her pocket. With it she liked to go to the small coffee shop on the main street where she enjoyed the comforts of small town home cooking and milk shakes.

If Arthur had been the administrator in a hospital such as the Ottawa Civic or General, his title might have been aptly presented as "mayor". These institutions are really like small towns in themselves. From my very limited recent experiences in walking the halls and keeping my ears open, I did not realize that there is much more than doctors, nurses and of course, patients, under the roof. There are book stores and libraries, shops of all kinds, banks, wig fitters, coffee places, chapels, restaurants, dental offices and even hotels for family visiting from out of town. There is a substantial infrastructure in place to handle power outages, the simultaneous arrival of multiple emergency vehicles, a helicopter port, environment maintenance, a street network and parking lots and garages. The computer and communication systems must be impressively large to handle all the information flows.  Much of these services are deployed out of site but you know they are there. What you do see, and quite frequently, are the security staff. I wondered about this.

If you are in the morning coffee queue, you may see two or three security persons striding purposely down the corridor.  Very seldom do they walk alone. They appear to be wearing flak jackets or at least Kevlar vests, not quite like those worn by the US navy seals but impressive none-the-less. The word "Security" is prominent across the back of their usually quite beefy shoulders. So where are they going and for what reason? I began to think that yes, some activities in this large place would occasionally necessitate the services of these folks. But what exactly? Perhaps some tired soul had their credit card eaten by the parking machine and they were administering more than just words to it. Perhaps a patient had gone missing from G Sector, Floor 2, Tower B. Maybe a visitor had mistakenly entered the building thinking that it was a drug store and was looking for those little white pills. Could someone actually be taking one of the 25,000 hospital gowns home? Did someone get short changed in the cafeteria and was sounding a loud complaint? Was someone trying to unscrew the 6" by 4" black and white television over one of the sleeping patients' beds? Could there be a speed limit on wheel chair conveyance and someone was in excess of this? Had there been a collision of two of these and a hit-and-wheel off was in progress?

I can not report that I saw anything more than rounds being made or the security staff walking to one of the shops or food services. I never saw handcuffs or assault weapons being demonstrated or anyone dressed in camouflage. No secretive talking into a hidden microphone was observed. I guess that having these people there is a necessity in a hospital. Like the elaborate fire fighting systems there, it is good to know that if the time comes then there is something in place to deal with the situation. I guess that if Arthur was still with us he could have set me straight on the types of challenges that hospital security face.

August 20, 2011 (Saturday)

The day began with me heading over to the nearby egg farm for some truly fresh breakfast items. The farm is only a few minutes away and Laurie elected to stay and read on the sofa. There are several "biohazard beware" signs as you enter the farm property. These signs are a bureaucratic requirement it seems as the owner indicated to me some time ago to just ignore them. What one must be aware of though is Kaiser. This is a farm dog in the truest sense. He makes Cujo look like Scamp. He sees you coming far before you know that he is around. At first sight you feel that maybe you would rather skip the eggs and have a bowl of cereal instead. I believe that even Caesar Milan might hop back on the plane to California rather than deal with Kaiser. Well, this is where experience becomes important. Kaiser approaches the car with stealth. He usually makes his presence known as you open the door or are about a meter or two away.

Then the tail begins to wag and the tongue begins to lick the skin off of your hand. Once you say his name a few times and remark on what a good boy he is then he becomes your best friend. The time to get the eggs becomes longer as he escorts you to the door of the barn and waits for you. Paying personal attention to him is a must. I keep reminding myself to bring a dog treat on the next visit. So, having got the main ingredient for breakfast it was back to the house to do the cooking.

The rest of the day was not as exciting. It was simply a quiet day of resting, eating, drinking and some light exercise. I did some work with the boxes that I returned from the storage locker while Laurie spent the afternoon resting.

August 21, 2011 (Sunday)

We were awaken at 00:35, 01:35 and 02:30 by mother nature's mighty show of thunder, lightning and at times, heavy rain and wind. We live in a forest with 100 year old maple trees with branches hanging very close to the house. Storms are not our most settling of moments being where we are. After a hearty breakfast, our day did not start very well. The issue was that the printer had run out of the yellow and black ink. Rather than printing everything in fuschia, I asked Laurie if she remembered how to change the ink containers. Well, she was right on it. The yellow was changed first without a hitch. The black container was a double size and I opened it like I did the yellow. However, the ink began to flow out of the container. It first hit Laurie's sock and then over various parts of my hands and thence onto the grey carpet. I have no idea what I did differently but I was not very pleased.

As I dashed for a splatter guard and tossed the leaking container into the garage I knew that an industrial carpet cleaner agent would likely be required. Laurie's sock was a write off. The carpet is a little better after the application of carpet cleaner and some vigorous rubbing and blotting. I still need to find something to try and remove the remaining blob - thinking that something like soda water might be a cheap solution.

Friends arrived about 11:00. They came over from the Belleville area which is about a 2 hour and 15 minute drive. We had arranged to meet and they brought some seasonal green beans, his famous spaghetti sauce and his very tasty chilli. He and I then made a bit of a road trip while his wife and Laurie got along just fine. It was a fine day at the house but the region did have some serious localized rain showers. About 16:00 they headed home and we sat down and enjoyed an easy to prepare meal.

Tomorrow was our early appointment at the Civic Hospital for Laurie's MRI so we packed it in early. We would need to be up and about by 05:45 to comfortably make it for the 08:00 scanning. The rain did reach the house in the late afternoon and continued throughout the night. Wishing that the MRI goes well and that Laurie's tumour is not starting to become enlarged.

August 22, 2011 (Monday)

This was to be the busy day of the week. First the MRI at 08:00. Then a short drive across to the green house to check on the grasses. At 13:00 we had to be at the General Hospital for a CT scan and the making of her head gear for her radiation treatment. The MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) and CT (Computerized Tomotherapy) scans were needed by the radiation oncologist in order to prepare the radiation plan. 

We did get up early and Laurie was sufficiently engaged in the day ahead. She was aware of the things on the list and looking forward to getting them done. The MRI is an instrument that she is not fond of. This is partially due to the length of time that she must remain absolutely still (about 20 minutes) and also the noise that it makes. It is a very large machine and looks to be out of some episode of the first Star Trek series. She changes into the hospital gown as well even though the scan is only for the brain region.

After the MRI I invited her to the hospital cafeteria for breakfast. The idea of eating before going to Ottawa was not appealing so she only had some yogurt with her pills. I think that the cafeteria meals are pretty decent in terms of quality, quantity and price. They exceed the meals that patients receive. She had a breakfast English muffin with bacon and cheese which she thoroughly enjoyed along with some orange juice. Tea rather than coffee is still the current hot beverage of choice.

We then drove the short distance to the green house. She was very pleased to see her grasses doing so well. Many already needed another trimming. Some of these grasses are growing as quickly as the hair on her head. I came prepared with the scissors and began the work. She was engaged in relabelling some of the plastic identification tags. It was amazing that based on a four digit number she could recall the name of the grass, where it was collected and when. This makes for a successful day in my view. We spent just over one hour tidying everything up and chatting a little with one of the people who works there.

We then drove east to the General Hospital. I found what must be the optimal parking spot as it was generously wide and very close to the entrance. As we had a little time on our hands (remember how I like to be early), we had a little food at the Timmy's. We found the radiation south department and received the instructions for her CT work.  We waited in comfortably appointed surroundings for her to be called. I went with Laurie and the technician to the CT room for a run down on the next steps. It was quite an interesting discussion. The technician then brought out the mould for Laurie's mask and explained the procedure slowly and thoroughly. I even took pictures of the event. I had to then leave the room as the actual CT scan would be done with Laurie's new mask in place.

It was only a matter of a few minutes before she appeared with the technician in the waiting room. Similar to the MRI earlier, she had to wear a hospital gown for this scan. So, the day's events had ended and basically on schedule. Hurray! Back in the car and heading home. We took the scenic way and stopped in Kemptville for a few items. A well needed rest until supper time. While Laurie slept I reviewed all of the hospital reports that I received in the mail today. They are very interesting and I learned much more about the operation and some of the future steps. These reports are very medical in nature. It is good to see that her GP has indeed received this information.

We ended this busy day with some recall exercises. She is getting much better now with these and I am very pleased with the progress. I am sure that her speech therapist will see the gains when she visits tomorrow.

August 23, 2011 (Tuesday)

Up again twice last night for trips to the bathroom. She is good at nudging me when the time comes. I still get up with her and escort her there and back even though she is becoming more capable. I just want to be sure that given how sleepy she would be that there are no falls on the trip there and back.

Eggs and bacon for breakfast. I told Laurie that we had eight eggs and 12 yolks. She laughed and wondered about this. It was in fact true. I had picked up two dozen eggs, 12 of which were double yolks. I can't recall ever having these but they were the eggs coming down the egg lane at the farm on Saturday morning. Her appetite continues to grow and she basically eats everything that I give her.

A call was returned from Laurie's case manager this morning. She has now confirmed that Laurie's very pricy chemotherapy drug is covered by the Ontario Drug Benefit Plan. The pharmacy has the pills for pick up and my bill will be $2.00. This is a saving of nearly $2,085.00 which makes me the shopper of the week. Having had this good news I then received the bad.  The hospital radiation scheduler called to say that Laurie's treatments would not begin this week. Based on the two scans taken yesterday, the oncologist decided to treat Laurie on a different piece of equipment that would be better for her. This makes perfect sense to us. So, the treatments will now begin next Tuesday in the late afternoon at the General Hospital. I also confirmed that there are no treatments on holidays like Labour Day. If a treatment is missed for any reason, then that treatment is tacked on to the end of the program. Currently, her last day of radiation would be October 12th.

With the change in plans I needed to reschedule the nurse who was to come this Friday.  I also confirmed an appointment that arrived in today's mail. It concerned a CT scan in early September for 9:00 p.m. I wondered if the time was correct. So I called and discovered that it was. Apparently, the CT team takes appointments up to about mid-night. The person that I spoke with told me that most of the calls that she takes related to the same question that I had. I offered the suggestion of writing the time as 21:00 and 9:00 p.m. in brackets. She did not really say much at this point about my recommendation which I felt was of some value. So, another CT appointment at the General. This will be used to gauge the changes to the tumour based on her early radiation treatments.

The speech therapist also called to reschedule her visit. We came up with Friday afternoon as that day was now fully ours to spend as we please.

Caught up on the laundry and cleaning which always makes me feel good at the end of a day.

August 24, 2011 (Wednesday)

Summer continues here in Eastern Ontario. Laurie seems at ease today and reports having a good sleep. I noted that she was up three times for nature calls but I don't think that she realizes this as much as I do.  Our real estate person came over to tidy up some loose ends (no, we are not moving). She is also a nurse and remarked how good she thought Laurie was - both mentally and physically. She asked again when the operation had been. Given this she said that Laurie is doing remarkably well. This made me very happy and Laurie smile.

About 10:00 the home care person came for a four hour sitting. Having this arranged permitted me to take the car into Ottawa to get it serviced. I had called for an appointment when I knew that I had a four hour window of opportunity at hand. I spoke with the service staff member and explained my situation in a general way. I said that I was not expecting fast service like a formula 1 pit stop but that I did need some quick consideration when I arrived. He promised that this would be the case. So, as I was walking out of the door to look at the shiny and expensive 2012's on the lot, our car was being driven off quickly - hoping by a mechanic and not a thief.  True to their word I had fast service and the main part of my free time was over. I then did some grocery shopping and picked up some new crisp Egyptian cotton sheets. Having a few sets of new sheets will make Laurie more comfortable I think, especially if the next steps of her treatment will lead to her being in bed more often. It has been a while since I have shopped for sheets and was therefore a little bewildered at the selection of colours, cost and the sizes. Of course the size I wanted must be the most popular because my choices were very limited. What I thought, and bought, was a dark blue sheet was in fact not. Upon closer inspection in day light, I had bought what was fashionably described as "liquorice" in colour. I would call it simply black and they are going back.

Arriving home 40 minutes before my due time, I found Laurie and the home care lady enjoying the front deck. They had eaten lunch, gone for a short stroll and had kindly collected the empty trash can and recycling boxes from the end of the driveway. The lunch dishes were also washed and air drying. This is like having a domestique and a friendly one at that.  We spent the rest of the day relaxing and me cooking dinner. Laurie has been very helpful in deciding what she would like to eat for all of her meals.

It rained hard at times over night but for short bursts a time. The sound of thunder was a continuation for minutes at a time. We felt secure and comfortable even at 02:00 and even with the old sheets on the bed.

August 25, 2011 (Thursday)

A very quiet day as there were no appointments to attend to or persons scheduled to arrive. It was supposed to be the day of Laurie's first radiation treatment and start of the chemotherapy. She is doing quite well again today. She is progressing along with better recall it seems each day. She now knows the order of the seasons, forwards and backwards. She is starting to get involved in light domestic things and moving more independently.

In the afternoon we journeyed into Kemptville for a couple of items. In particular, Laurie was in need of some new woman's upper foundations. Well, the store we went to had large enough overhanging signage that you could see them from the parking lot. Some of it did not quite make enough shopping sense to me to know what it was. The main thing is that Laurie did and we found ourselves in two large aisles of woman's upper undergarments - advertised as being in the "intimates" section. I did not think that I could be of much help especially since Laurie did remember to bring her glasses along. Looking at all the little numbers on the garment tags I didn't know if it was a size or the product number. Feeling quite helpless I simply carried the various items to the change room for her. I did much better in the cookie department though. We also picked up some new socks for her. There was a bag of six pairs of socks from a major sock manufacturer for the price of $5.00. Good socks by all appearances. I don't think that you could ship one pair of socks from anywhere to anywhere for under $5.00. And these socks were made in the U.S.A.

We drove back home under a sky that was at one moment sun and the next looked as if the storm chaser crew would be passing you to try and get the best pictures. A heavy tower of rain seemed to be parked over our general area and I thought about the advantages of not having to water for another week. Then again I just had the car washed and was trying to weigh these two outcomes for maximum benefit. I still have the clean car and maybe some flowers to water tomorrow.

We started to watch another mystery series that we have on DVD. This series is called "Lovejoy" and is from the mid 1980s onwards. We watched it several years ago and really enjoyed it. I can not recall how many episodes there are but they do cover quite a number of years of production. Laurie is already looking forward to tomorrow's show.

August 26, 2011 (Friday)

The day is another nice summer day here. Windows open and everything appears to be in order. This has indeed been a week of calmness before what may be a rather dark and stormy week ahead. Laurie and I were up only once last night. This makes a big difference in how refreshed she feels in the morning. She takes her pills both morning and evening. These continue to treat any potential swelling in the brain and for dealing with related stomach issues. She takes these with yogurt in bed. Recently, this is followed by a cup of Irish breakfast tea which she quite enjoys.

Breakfast is going well. She is having fruit, something hot (bacon and eggs or porridge), toast and juice. She knows that she needs to improve her strength for the days and weeks ahead. It is just past lunch time here. She has been reading another mystery novel. She has indicated a desire for us to go to an antique show that we have usually attended over the past years. This is tomorrow and it sounds like a good opportunity to go out as the weather is supposed to be perfect. I will try and find that "chair in a bag" thing that I believe we still have unpacked someplace in the basement. This would be handy should she get a tad tired while walking or waiting for my negotiating with a dealer to come to an end - for something that we don't really need of course. Her wanting to do this type of activity is a positive sign that the Laurie of old is returning. This week has shown this to be the case in many ways.

I am apprehensive as to the effects of both the radiation and chemotherapy treatments that start next week. I have read and reread the information picked up at the hospital on the side effects that may occur. She seems to know about these now but has not shown that much concern. I realize that she is taking the practical approach here and understands that to achieve more success in dealing with her illness that her journey along the road to recovery may at times be difficult.

Enjoy your weekends and please continue to think of Laurie.

Mark